Chapter 33: Determinism of Mana

Valdrova’s routine was extremely simple.

An enemy appears.

She crushes it.

She roars.

She returns home.

More than a Duchess, she seemed like a barbarian warrior.

She had always protected the people, and had never felt any rejection toward it.

But lately, she had started to doubt one thing.

— Krrraa—

To roar.

That roar, perfect for the frenzy of battle and declaring victory, had recently begun to feel embarrassing to her.

— Ah…

Her voice faded like a whisper.

Valdrova let out that incomplete feeling and cleared her throat.

Her eyes drifted toward the place that had made her change.

Her gaze turned to the top of a solitary mountain.

Every time she went out to the battlefield, Perda was always there.

‘He didn’t come today either.’

But at the top there was only flattened ground.

As always, he had not come to watch her.

Valdrova felt uncomfortable under his gaze.

When he watched her, she became nervous and clumsy.

And that made her look ridiculous.

She had even thought it was better if he did not look at her.

‘Yes maybe it’s better this way.’

Valdrova spread her wings and returned to her lair.

The solitary mountain of the Far East.

She chose that place because it was difficult for humans to find.

When she entered the cave, Ruri received her.

“Good work, my lady.”

Valdrova passed by without responding.

Seeing her ignore even a greeting, Ruri followed her inside.

“Is something wrong?”

— It’s nothing.

Valdrova coiled up as if nothing had happened.

“Please, tell me. I want to help you.”

— Mm…

—Has Perda… grown tired of me?

“…Huh?”

Ruri looked at her in disbelief.

— He didn’t come today either.

Valdrova thought it was better this way.

But a greater sense of emptiness came over her.

It was a normal day.

And yet, she felt that something important was missing.

“It has only been two times. One week. It is very little compared to the time you have lived.”

— I know.

Only one week. Only two times.

And yet, those words weighed too much.

“Perda has been very busy lately.”

He had been collaborating with merchants and resolving matters of the local lords.

When he entered his office, he would not come out until late at night.

— Even so… he used to come before, didn’t he?

That was true.

No matter how busy he was, he always came when he knew Valdrova was fighting.

And when their gazes met, he always smiled at her.

— Surely… since I don’t even pay attention to him, he has grown tired of me.

She lowered her head, dejected.

But Ruri did not think the same.

‘If he had really grown tired, he would not be so busy.’

Perda acted for the well-being of everything under Valdrova.

And that came from his affection for her.

— Ruri.

“Yes, my lady.”

Valdrova spoke with difficulty.

— That thing ladies do…

“Do you mean a tea party?”

— Yes. That.

Ruri was surprised.

Since the prince incident, Valdrova had avoided humans.

— Could you… propose a tea party to Perda?

She had taken a big step to meet her fiancé.

***

Perda became a third-circle mage.

The first circle is a point.

The second, a line.

The third, a surface.

That plane is the magic circle.

The true beginning of magic.

‘Also, the Magic Library disappeared.’

It was a memory method that stored magic in the mind.

It was only obtained at the fifth circle.

But by going back in time, he lost it.

‘Even so, the magic is still in my body.’

Magic in the subconscious.

Like exploring a ruined library.

He concentrated mana in his right arm.

The flow was natural.

‘Draw a magic circle.’

First step concretion.

He recalled a magic circle.

Normally it is done with books.

But he did it differently. He drew without knowing the purpose.

Like casting a fishing rod.

And waiting.

‘I’m sorry.’

Second step: structuring.

He imagined a quill moving.

The circle appeared in his hand.

Third step: materialization.

He injected mana.

The circle glowed.

‘This spell…’

Without thinking, he acted.

He pointed with two fingers.

“Elemental Bolt.”

Bzzzz!

A bolt shot out.

‘Dangerous.’

He almost injured himself.

But he did not stop.

He searched for another spell.

‘I’m sorry.’

He drew another circle.

And then.

It turned black.

Darkness.

Pure black magic. Before thinking.

“Shadow Hand.”

The shadow of the candle stirred.

And separated.

A new arm.

‘There are side effects.’

Unlike Magic Hand.

This creates a new arm.

It does not cover it.

‘The cost is mental.’

Confusion.

Is it my arm?

Or not?

If you fail. Extreme pain.

But Perda already mastered this.

‘Even so… it doesn’t feel like mine.’

He looked at his black hand.

And began to test its movements.

It was as natural as a real hand. It was as natural as if it were his original hand.

Perda averted his gaze and looked up at the shelf.

Normally, it was a distance that required standing up and taking about ten steps.

Perda extended his hand toward it.

‘Arms can stretch.’

Following that idea that broke common sense, the shadow hand extended beyond its limit.

It stretched far enough to cover the distance of those ten steps, took the book on the shelf, and returned.

‘It is a third-level spell, but too demanding for someone at the third level.’

The more detailed the control, the greater the imagination and mental strength required.

That is precisely the essence of black magic.

It has high performance, but demands an equally high level.

If that level is not reached, it is easy to lose one’s sanity with these spells.

‘When I reach the fourth circle, it will be more stable.’

Thinking that, Perda murmured.

“The next stage…”

His mind became complex.

It was a moment when he should seek improvement, but he did not feel the usual drive.

‘To stabilize it completely, I need an amount of mana equivalent to the fourth circle.’

It was the amount needed to fully suppress Valdrova’s ferocity.

That was why he wanted to advance no matter what.

However, now something was blocking him.

It might be because he had reached the third circle without difficulty, but the biggest reason was, without a doubt, the recent affinity test.

‘Determinism of mana…’

Perda had learned many things from his master, who had great greed for money, and among them was the theory of magical determinism.

It was a theory that resonated more with holders of the Red Circle than with those of the Blue Circle.

It stated that, even if one awakened in another timeline with different purposes and events, one’s attributes remained unchanged, an idea derived from determinism.

‘It was a useless discussion.’

As useless as proving a utopia.

Not for nothing was it called a theory that broke human relationships.

But Perda, who had gone back in time, could not ignore it.

‘I no longer feel hostility toward my family nor hatred toward the world.’

He had decided to live only for her, so he thought his attributes would have changed as well.

However, what was granted to him was darkness and electricity.

Exactly the same magic he used in the past.

‘What did I feel when I knew I had these attributes?’

No matter what, he was happy.

There are two attributes that the Blue Circle cannot handle properly.

Light and darkness.

Light manifests in clerics through a righteous heart.

Darkness arises from negative emotions, as in Perda’s case.

Having affinity with darkness implies the disadvantage of not being able to use light magic or healing magic.

But in exchange, unlike other users of the Red Circle, he does not suffer a great reduction in other elemental magics.

Because of that, Perda could handle almost all elements, except light, at the level of elemental masters.

‘But now…’

It was not something good.

The current situation with Valdrova was different.

What was once a blessing that allowed him to stand out now felt like a curse.

‘Valdrova suffers because of the nature of darkness and I possess darkness.’

It had already been proven that by injecting mana he could influence her.

But if instead of stabilizing her, what he did was plant another seed of darkness inside someone who already suffered from it, what would happen?

If what he gave ended up leading to destruction, could it really be called helping her?

‘If the mana that killed her kills her again…’

Just as mana does not change, if fate does not change either,

‘Should someone like me be by her side?’

Even for Perda, who was once an archmage and dominated the world, that was unknown territory.

And whenever he faced the unknown, he challenged it.

But now, it only plunged him into deep doubt.

A mage’s research connects directly with magic.

That deep thought of Perda gave rise to another spell from his subconscious.

Following his intuition, he structured a magic circle again.

It was only when the structure was complete that he realized.

‘What is this spell?’

It was not something forgotten.

It was a form he had truly never seen.

An extremely complex formula, filled with runes.

Due to its complexity, it was comparable to sixth-level spells.

But if it were truly sixth-level, it would have collapsed at the structuring stage and would not look like this.

And above all, he would remember it.

Without a doubt, it was a spell drawn from his subconscious.

Shadow Hand and Elemental Bolt were also like that, but even so he was able to recall their names afterward.

But this.

Although it floated above his palm, he could not remember its name.

‘As if it never had one.’

He did not understand it.

Perda used the Shadow Hand he had manifested to take magical copy paper from the cabinet.

He placed it over the magic circle he maintained and copied its shape and symbols.

He observed the circle.

He tried to understand it, but even with his knowledge he could not analyze it.

Knock, knock.

Someone knocked on the door.

— It’s Ruri.

Perda rolled up the parchment and set it aside.

“Come in.”

The door opened and the young maid entered.

As always, she had an expressionless face.

“You seem to have many concerns.”

“I’ve been thinking about several things.”

He concealed both the magic circle and his thoughts.

He did not think Ruri needed to know.

“What do you think about a tea party?”

While they were eating, Ruri asked that question.

“A tea party? With whom?”

“Who else could it be but my lady?”

Ruri spoke more firmly than usual.

“My lady personally asked me to arrange this. If you wish, it can be this very afternoon.”

“A tea party with my fiancée…?”

Perda imagined it.

She, dressed in an elegant dress, drinking tea gracefully.

And Valdrova in that refined environment.

‘I want to go without a doubt.’

Under normal circumstances, he would have accepted immediately.

“It is a good idea, but I do not think it is the right time.”

“…Excuse me?”

Ruri asked as if she had misheard.

Perda answered once again.

“There is no need to rush. I need some time to think, so let’s postpone it.”

“……”

Perda spoke calmly, as always.

Ruri stared at him before speaking.

“Are you playing with my lady?”

“Playing?”

“A struggle between lovers for control. Are you trying to make Perda fall more in love with you…?”

“It’s not that.”

It was not easy for him to have that kind of complex thoughts about relationships.

“Then what is it?”

“It’s nothing.”

“You always said you wanted to see her. If you say that now, it seems like you are about to die.”

“It’s not that, don’t worry.”

“I will not leave until you answer.”

Since Perda was acting differently, Ruri also became insistent.

It seemed she would follow him even to the bath.

He thought about ignoring her, but.

“Have you grown tired of my lady?”

He could not ignore that.

The moment he heard those words, Perda’s heart sank.

“Why do you say that?”

“My lady said it. She said that lately you do not go to see her fight. That since you do not even show up, it seems you have grown tired.”

Grown tired?

That was impossible.

Perda only wanted to see her.

Only now he could no longer observe her as before.

“If that is not it, then you should give an appropriate answer.”

Ruri’s loyal eyes shone silver.

Perda finally spoke.

“…Lately I have been worried.”

“Anyone could notice that. What are you worried about?”

“My mana contains darkness. I am worried that that darkness might harm her.”

“Is that all?”

Ruri removed her glove and extended her hand.

“Then, try it.”

“With you?”

Ruri nodded.

“I am also a spawn with dragon blood. Even if it is little, I can detect if something harms my lady.”

Perda decided to try without further hesitation.

A small hand, like a girl’s.

But it was not completely soft.

Perda injected his mana into her.

“What do you feel?”

Ruri tilted her head.

“…I am not sure what I should feel. I only feel that the mana flows into me.”

“Do you not feel anything else?”

“No.”

The amount of mana was equivalent to a Mana Shot.

With Valdrova, that amount already caused a reaction.

“I will try with more.”

Now it was five units.

An amount enough to affect magical circuits.

Ruri’s expression changed slightly.

“And now?”

“I feel something, like you said… but it is not harmful. It is just mana.”

Ruri frowned and looked at Perda in disbelief.

“You worried about something so insignificant and ended up frightening my lady?”

“…Yes.”

“You turn people into dogs and break their fingers, but when it comes to my lady, you are extremely cowardly.”

Valdrova, the Red Dragon, an existence impossible to stop.

But before Perda, she was nothing more than a fragile woman like a flower.

And the possibility of hurting her was too much for him.

“As the one who will be her husband, you should not cause her worries over something so trivial.”

“You’re right.”

“Fuu…”

Perda nodded, and Ruri let out a deep sigh.

She could clearly feel how much she had suffered being between both of them.

“Then, what will you do?”

What else?

“I will accept the invitation. If my fiancée personally requested it, I cannot ignore it.”

There was no other option but to face it.

“Understood.”

Ruri bowed and left the dining room.

Once she left, Perda looked at the parchment he had set aside.

‘Investigating this now will only bring me more concerns.’

He could ask Morida to identify the spell.

Or ask Echidna to interpret it.

But he felt that he had to understand it himself.

So, he carefully folded the parchment and placed it between the pages of a book.

If one day he found it by chance, he would think about it then.

He decided to forget it for now.

***

‘He always gets involved in unnecessary things…’

Ruri walked down the hallway murmuring to herself.

He had rejected the invitation arrogantly, and the reason was trivial.

‘Normally he is straightforward, but with my lady…’

He could be ruthless with others, but with Valdrova he was a coward.

‘That his mana might harm her…?’

Ruri looked at her right hand.

He said she felt nothing, but in reality she had felt something strange.

And that sensation still remained in the hand Perda had touched.

‘I don’t know what this is.’

It was a strange sensation, but it was certainly not dangerous.

‘I can’t say it and frighten him more…’

Ruri put her glove back on and kept walking.

A loyal servant had no rest.