Chapter 355: Nightmare (2)

I repeated to myself.

This is a dream.

I used to have dreams like this often.

Today, however, it feels like someone carefully flipped open a hidden page from my past.

I guess it’s because of what happened. Maybe my exhausted body dragged my mind to its limit as well.

Smack!

A hand the size of a pot lid slapped my face, turning my head. My mouth tasted like iron. The inside of my cheek had burst.

“Geom-Ma? This bastard lost it? What, you dreaming or something?”

My dull gaze drifted to the window. Outside, rain fell endlessly.

Rumble.

No lightning struck. Just the distant rumble behind the black clouds.

My master always told me—

“Everyone carries a seed of good and evil in their chest. Love is the fertilizer of good, abuse is the fertilizer of evil.”

Smack!

It doesn’t matter.

Even if it hurts.

Even if this house feels as real as ever.

This is a dream. That’s how I used to endure it as a child—hypnotizing myself like that.

“…I have…”

A family that loves me.

Smack!

I’m not giving up.

***

“Y-You…! You little bastard! Did you just hit your father?!”

I ran away from home.

“Don’t stop him, honey! It’s fine! Today, it’s either him or me!”

His voice stabbed into my back like a thorn. I ran from those disgusting people, pushing through the rain and wind.

“Damn it.”

I tried to curse, but rainwater entered my mouth. The tears of the sky didn’t taste salty. They left a bitter, metallic taste.

‘This dream is especially cruel.’

Afraid he’d beat me to death, I had kneed him straight in the groin.

Unfortunately, this was a dream. I didn’t have my sashimi knife, nor the strength to stab. Judging by the size of my hands and feet, I was just about the right age to have started middle school.

There weren’t many scars on my forearms yet either, so it must’ve been around then.

“Haah, haah…”

I slipped into an alley. Thanks to a hanging green awning, I managed to take cover from the rain for a moment.

Water from the pipes was spilling into a clogged drainage grate.

As I stared at it blankly, a dry laugh escaped me.

“…This is complete shit.”

A pathetic sight like something out of a painting. Sadly, this was what my stained past really looked like. A typical portrait of a family surviving in the shadows.

‘That was me.’

Leaning against the wall, I let my head fall back. The chill of the bricks helped cool my brain.

“How long am I going to keep dreaming about this?”

When I murmured, vapor came from my breath.

Adding this life to the last, more than forty years must’ve passed since that time.

And yet, it rears its head out of nowhere, shattering all peace of body and soul.

I found it ironic.

Having become the God of the Sword, and dreaming—not of anything else—but of this nightmare.

Come to think of it, I hadn’t dreamed in years. Suddenly, something Yu Sein once said came to mind.

“Those under the influence of Suppression rarely dream.”

So this was, without a doubt, an abnormal phenomenon. And it didn’t take long to find the reason.

It must be the aftermath of having split the Apostle of Suppression, Ragnarok, in two, just two days ago.

I really was starting to resemble a proper possessed.

“Ugh…”

I stood up, staggering. Every time I had nightmares like this, there was a place I always went.

Not the seafood place from the boss.

As far as I remembered, the current boss hadn’t taken it over yet.

That wouldn’t happen until early next year.

“If I go now, some total stranger will probably throw me out after humiliating me.”

I began to walk.

Limping. Limping.

I don’t know how far I walked.

A bronze sign greeted me.

Five characters in a formal font that rumbled in my chest.

Garam Middle School

The place I used to attend. Though technically, I dropped out in my second year.

Hey, don’t get it twisted.

It wasn’t because of “some incurable illness,” never.

I walked inside for the first time in years.

Splash. Splash.

I crossed the muddy schoolyard, soaked by rain, heading straight for the main building. It was a holiday—no one in sight.

“Compared to Joaquin Academy… this is like another world.”

They say home and school reflect society. And it’s true.

A child rejected at home will also be rejected at school. Teachers were quick to say, “Go fetch your parents.”

But in my case, the problem ran deeper. I couldn’t even use “Mr.” or “Mrs.” before the word “parent.”

To make things worse, my family situation became gossip among the teachers. Wealthy gangsters, degrading night work.

It was a miracle worse rumors didn’t spread. So even when I wasn’t at fault in certain incidents, I was always blamed.

Because there was no one to speak for me. That’s how one after another, people treated me however they wanted.

At first, I endured it.

But I didn’t last more than three times.

I decided to show them exactly what they expected from me. That is, to return the favor in kind. And don’t get this wrong either—

I didn’t know how to use knives back then. I was small and scrawny, so I got by with nothing but clever tricks.

“You… you! How dare you hit my son!”

“I’m sorry! Forgive me! Ah, Kim ■■! What are you doing?! Apologize now!”

‘Hah, so you’re that kid? The brat’s a damn thug and the mom sells herself. Mr. Heo, is Garam a school or an orphanage? Why do you accept this trash, huh? Even if Anam’s not the fanciest district, a school should have some standards, some dignity…!’

I was able to endure Joaquin Academy only because I had already built up my calluses.

In any case, I ended up punching that father in the mouth and left school on my own.

Before the expulsion letter arrived, I beat them to it and submitted my resignation.

The school board accepted it like they’d been waiting for it.

Yeah. I was that student—the one the school desperately wanted to get rid of.

And in this dream, I’d walked right back into that same school of my own will. Looking back now, it wasn’t some cheesy “we were kids, we didn’t know better, haha” kind of thing.

No. If I lived through it again, I’d shove a sashimi knife in their necks.

“…That place changed me a lot…”

The reason why the concept of “school” became an emotional refuge to me was undoubtedly thanks to Joaquin Academy.

My house.

My home.

Where my family is.

And since Garam was the closest in style to Joaquin, I always end up coming here in these nightmares.

Creaaak—

I opened an old door and entered. Inside, it looked no different from any ordinary school.

There were half-decent nameplates arranged, and just ahead of the main entrance, stairs led to the second floor.

“…You.”

“……”

Why are you standing there?

“So this is your hell.”

Chaerina spoke as she looked around.

“…This your doing?”

“No.”

She answered firmly.

“Just as you’re Fenrir, my attribute is Hela. From the moment we acknowledged Suppression, we’ve been tied by a bond.”

“…”

“If you’re in hell, is it really so strange that I’m here?”

She descended the stairs, one step at a time. Her jet-black hair flowed with a sheen.

“You’re what’s strange. That’s why all of this is strange.”

“Ugh, harsh.”

“…At least moisten your lips before spitting venom.”

“Was that a come-on?”

I frowned and stepped back. Chaerina came right up to my nose.

She was only slightly taller than me, in this dream where I was a first-year middle schooler.

“If you know how to get in, you must know how to get out too. So let me out. I’ve had enough.”

“I don’t know.”

“I hate liars. If I stab you with a sashimi knife when I wake up for lying, don’t complain.”

“Threats won’t work. Because I really don’t know.”

“…”

“…”

Silence.

As I stared into her eyes for a while, it became clear that Chaerina wasn’t bluffing.

“…So this is one of those things too, right? If I overcome the trauma, I’m free…”

“Who knows. Maybe yes, maybe no.”

“Shame I don’t have a sashimi knife right now.”

“Not everything can be fixed with knives.”

Chaerina turned around. With her hands folded behind her back, she started walking ahead of me, then tilted her head slightly.

“Let’s walk a bit.”

“…”

I hate these kinds of setups.

Tap, tap.

We went up the stairs and walked down a straight hallway.

The classrooms were labeled from 1 to 4. Unlike Joaquin Academy, which was divided into only four classes Tiger, Wolf, Dragon, and Star (the last one had been gone for a while now).

“See anything strange?”

Chaerina asked.

“…Not really…”

Now that I think about it, each classroom had a window right at eye level. Normally, windows are closer to the ceiling, but here, they were unusually low.

Noticing me staring, Chaerina resumed walking. I followed behind, dragging my feet. My eyes remained fixed on the windows.

[1-1]

My pupils widened.

“…..!”

Inside the classroom, where desks should’ve been lined up, red smoke was rising.

It wasn’t moving—it was completely still. Like a three-dimensional reenactment of an ancient life scene displayed in a museum.

“That’s Joaquin Academy.”

Chaerina said it casually and kept walking.

[1-2]

The disaster continued like a series. Ryozo and Abel, their faces smudged with soot, were evacuating people.

[1-3]

Abel lay with her head on Ryozo’s lap. Her eyes were closed, and her lips were so pale they looked bluish.

Ryozo, gently touching her eyelids, tried to hold back tears with a pained expression.

Tap.

When I reached out, Chaerina stopped me.

“Fenrir, are you even human?”

“…”

“You’re a god. The impact of a single move from you could cause a butterfly kill. No one can predict the outcome.”

Grrk.

I clenched my teeth hard.

[1-4]

Only Ryozo was visible. She was fighting alongside her companions and the former Seven Stars.

The red filter over the scene grew even more intense.

[1-5]

Behind Speedweapon, you could see the battlefield stretching beyond his back.

Even in her final breath, she continued casting buffs on her allies.

Even in death… still.

[1-6]

Rachel de Mura had fallen. Her body, barely held up by her war spear, finally collapsed.

[1-7]

Leon van Reinhardt had also fallen.

Metatron, wings torn, held him and roared.

[1-8]

All the heroes of the Seven Stars were dead.

[1-9]

The Hero Agency and the Association had been annihilated.

[1-10]

In the end, even the demons joined the conflict in an unprecedented event.

But far from turning the tide of war, Gehenna’s combat forces were wiped out.

Including the dragon race.

“Kuh!”

I couldn’t breathe. The deeper I sank, the more intense the red filter covering the world became.

But I knew. It was just that my eyes were bloodshot.

At some point, Chaerina had started walking beside me.

She didn’t show pity on her face.

I didn’t want it either. If she had shown even a hint of cheap pity, I’d probably have yelled at her on the spot.

I stopped.

As I walked along the wall, I couldn’t help but falter. I barely raised my eyes.

[1-11]

It was the end.

And because it was the last, the impact wasn’t so strong anymore.

It was just the culmination of all the previous damage. I was about to burst.

With bloodied lips, I said,

“…This is a clue.”

“Yes.”

“I need to understand it if I want to get out of here.”

Chaerina tilted her head slightly.

“…Even if you don’t escape, you have to face it…”

“Yeah… In the end, all of this is the result of my choices. I can’t look away…”

I slid along the wall and moved forward. I opened my tightly shut eyes and looked through the window.

There were Ryozo and Choi Seol-Ah. Both were crying. But one of them shed tears of blood.

“Ryo… zo…”

Did my voice reach her? Beyond the glass, Ryozo barely opened one eye. And as she looked at me, she mouthed.

“Sa… ve…”

And with that single word, her eyelids closed. My body leaned forward.

Chaerina stopped me just before I broke through the glass.

“At first, I also thought I had to adapt to the Suppression. That the end was inevitable, and that this world was fated to end.”

“…”

“But then, that snake playing saint told me. Fenrir… no, Kang Geom-Ma… you are the singularity of all the timelines in this world. And after what happened, I’ve decided to acknowledge you. Thanks to you, this world can have a happy ending without breaking its coherence. Not a hell worse than this one.”

Chaerina whispered.

“You just have to accept the evil inside you.”

Ding, dong, dang.

The school bell rang.

Crack.

A black sprout broke through the soil of my mind. And then, it bloomed in my chest.